Ageing Gracefully

Now I realize that I'm a bit young to be focusing my attention on this subject, but lately I've been pondering about the passing of time and how it affects both body and mind. Yes, I am talking about growing old. It's funny how when you're younger and you look at people who are ahead of you in years; you think to yourself, "Man, that guy is old!" I think we all do this - look at people's ages from the perspective of where we are ourselves in time (does that sound kinds science-fiction like? I was tempted to use the phrase "time-line" but that sounded too geeky-Star Trek talk...) It works backwards too; we have friends who are married and are really young (both are 20). I think to myself, "Gee, when I got married these guys were in kindergarten..."

But I find as I get older that I'm starting to reach those ages where I thought people were ready to turn to dust & blow away. When I became the same age as my brothers were when I got engaged (at 19) I thought of their reaction to the news that I was getting married. Now I have a niece who is about the same age as I was when I just got hitched, and I think if she got engaged I would react the same way my brothers did back then - with fear and trepidation! Another niece of mine is married today and has a career as a schoolteacher. I still remember the day she got out of the hospital - where did that little baby go? Oh, and I can't forget that I have two other nieces that were born just before Angel & I wed; if we want to think about how long we've been married we look no further than these girls who are graduating from high school next year...

There was a time where the passage of time bothered me, because I looked at from the perspective of loss. True, we all are slowly loosing our youth, energy and health to old age, and some day the sand in each of our hourglasses will run out. As time goes by we experience disappointments, failures and live with regrets. Time has been spent in ways that we wish we didn't spend it and it's time that we can never get back. But we also gain a lot over time too; we experience travel, friendship and accomplishments small and large. We shape our lives little by little with the good choices we make, and we can look back on these things with a sense of pride and accomplishment. And then we realize that we don't think of ourselves as "old"; we aren't defined by our age but rather we simply are who we are. I don't think of myself as someone who's in his later 30s, I think of myself as me.

So once I realize that age is all in my head I can actually begin to enjoy getting older. Sure, I won't look forward to aching joints, hair that relocates from the back of my head and starts growing out my ears instead (oh wait a minute, that's already starting...). But I do look forward to experiencing more of life. There was a time when I wasn't thankful to God for my life, but now I am because I see what I've gained even though there's been loss along the way. And getting older can also be fun. My good friend David turned 40 yesterday, and we had his "Half-Way to 80s" party on Saturday. It was such a blast, and it made me look forward to my 40th birthday in two years (I'm already brainstorming how I want to mark that auspicious occasion). It simply a matter of attitude that helps us age gracefully, and it's better to have a positive attitude because a negative one won't give you one minute of your life back. So forget the botox, add some more lines to my face and bring on the grey hair; I can take it and still feel like I'm 20-something.